Dear k.k.:

You wrote: “I just feel disgusting… still feel very bad about and I don’t know why. my anxiety overall has been acting up lately, hoping it passes soon”-

I hope your anxiety does pass soon, that you feel better and the issue is resolved. If it doesn’t, you may want to consider this: you presented the situation as this event happened and as a result you felt that you are disgusting. Maybe you felt disgusting before that event, nothing to do with that event, and maybe you felt disgusting after the event, nothing to do with that event. But because the event had a sexual component, you focus on it.

If that is so (and lots of us do get stuck on sex when the problem is elsewhere, more elaborate than a single sexual event), there is something else for you to attend to, and when attended and resolved (may take lots of time and work), then you will feel better long term.

anita