Recently I’m starting to have this feeling of exhaustion. Maybe it’s because my mother came back to this house (In last weeks she spends half of a week at the other place though), maybe it’s because he was so rude when he was leaving las time, and I just feel it’s too much. I know how it sounds but he was never rude earlier, even when he did something, he always acted like he cared, even when I found out he slept with someone he “tried” to make it right, apologized, made dinner, wanted to spend every weekend etc. Always pretended it’s all good, was nice and deluded me, in a nice way. So I always convinced myself, well he does want me to stay, he cares a little bit, which was enough for me, being in love with him. Now he was just rude, leaving after two hours. I know he could stay and we could order some food, his girlfriend knows he works till 8pm or even 11pm sometimes, and he has two jobs, so it’s not that unusual for him to come back late. I know he could, but he didn’t care how it looked, and how it would make me feel. Honestly I didn’t think he would just leave me like that, when we talked earlier about this meeting, I thought he would want to spend the night. So humiliating. I’m starting to really regret this. I feel I had enough, I feel exhausted, tortured.