It is an interesting paradox that it takes a strong and healthy ego to detach itself from the Self  and doing so enter the flow of the life/death/life cycle – vice fighting it.  Saying YES to life as it (life lives off life) while remaining fully engaged in life.

Ego is defined as

1. a person’s sense of self-esteem or self-importance.
2. the part of the mind that mediates between the conscious and the unconscious and is responsible for reality testing and a sense of personal identity.
3. (in metaphysics) a conscious thinking subject.

The ego plays an important role in the task of becoming, particularly as the mediator between the conscious and the unconscious. Without the ego it would be very difficult to communicate experience to others or ourselves (definition 2 and 3).

The problem arises when we attach our sense of Self to the ego (definition 1).  When we do this, we unconsciously attach the self and consciousness to our experiences, thoughts and or emotions.  “I” (which is a construct of language) becomes attached to a sense of identity… I am my experiences, I am my thoughts, I am my emotions, I am my ego… I am a construct of language… and we end up in knots, a plaything of emotions and manipulations.   In stead of a flowing consciousness we have a consciousness that is fixated on a emotion, thoughts, experience and all the pain that that brings.

In Jungian psychology the word death is associated with the cycle of life the life/death/life cycle so any letting go evolves a kind of dying. We make space for something else to emerge. It is a leap into uncertainty. A part of the ego that we cling is the idea that we can control the life/death/life process that is LIFE.  Letting go of that is scary so we hang on and the more we cling the more we suffer… and the more we cling….  until we let go… Equals “dying” is painful.

I saw the movie Inside Out over the weekend. It really demonstrates the suffering mind that clings to core memories and personas of the self. Before Riley new sense of self can be established the old sense of self is painfully destroyed but that this was required before the new more mature, perhaps less innocent sense of self could be create.  A process that movie implies is going to happen at every stage of life. Our sense of self is always changing so attaching ourselves to the sense of self (ego) is going to be painful when the time comes when it no longer works for us.

There is a time for everything including attaching our sense of self to our ego and the language construct “I” (which is mistaking the map for the territory).  As we awaken to the process we develop a healthy sense of self that “knows” when its time to let it go and make room for what comes next.