Hello Steve,

You said you wanted another view on what is happening, even though you say the answer is quite obvious and that you have tried to get out of this.

The reason you keep getting pulled back in is because of the payoff you get from being involved with her.  You are not ready to let her go.

She also is, as you say, “torn apart between two men.”

You do know, don’t you, that the definition of insanity is to keep doing the same thing over and over and expect different results.

Nothing has changed for her – she has you and the other guy.  Nothing has changed for you – you have her flitting in and out, and you know she is attracted to you.

Why should anything change?  Ultimately, what will have to happen is that YOU decide enough is enough.  That either she is in your life, completely and committed, or she is gone.  When will you get to that point?

I am also curious about what her response was the night this happened:

“Last Friday, after a night out, she got very horny and for the first time we ended up at my place. Things did get a little physical but she was ready to go all the way. I felt like it was going to be a one-night stand and I was not interested in that. Besides, I’m not ready to be with someone and share her with another man.”

Was she upset that you did not want to go all the way?  Did you actually tell her that you felt like it was going to be a one-night stand and that you were not interested in that?

Airene