Dear Kara:

You are welcome.

I will explain. You wrote in the post before last: “he is not acting this way to purposefully to hurt me, it is not malicious, I believe he is mentally not well”

By acting this way, you are referring in part to this: “apparently he is angry saying I used him for two years and I’m acting like a baby and how dare I do this to him again”-

He is angry at you. When a person is angry at another, naturally there is a wish or intent to hurt the person one is angry at. This is what anger is about, not only in humans but in other animals: anger motivates an animal to fight, which means to hurt another animal.

When your ex boyfriend is angry at you, naturally, he is motivated to hurt you, if not physically, than emotionally.

It doesn’t matter if he is mentally ill or mentally healthy, when one feels angry, one is motivated to hurt the object of their anger. This is what I mean by the sentence you quoted.

So he may be mentally ill, unwell, but he still wants to hurt, therefore he is capable of being malicious. The part that is good for you about his reputation of being a nice person, his reputation in his own mind, is that he is likely to not want to ruin it by going to far hurting you. Hopefully he will not go beyond what he said, that you used him for two years. Hopefully this is it.

I hope I explained the sentence well enough, did I?

anita