Dear Cali Chica:

I am glad you are back on track so quickly, and I am continuing to be amazed by you.

You wrote: “I do not have a bundle of stress and drama that is constantly brewing through my veins at every moment”. Of particular interest to me is that no longer being that bundle of stress, you “do not feel the need to talk to someone for hours and take on all their issues and become someone’s therapist”- becoming someone’s therapist (when not a professional therapist with a client) is a futile effort to resolve one own distress by proxy, perhaps. It never works not for “the therapist” and not for “the client”. And the efforts are driven by distress, not by calm.

Regarding your sister, you wrote: “every time I speak to her I feel like there is an explosion of distress that is coming out of ever pore, she doesn’t have to say anything at all… I just get this energy from her”- it is past experiences recorded in neuropathways, activated, like we discussed before (regarding the California visit).

“while speaking to her I realize there are many qualities that her and I share”- you will notice more and more, I think, that there are many qualities you share with other people, non family members, strangers. We humans are the same species after all, lot of commonality. Observing others and seeing ourselves better, as a result, as you express here, is one unmistaken element of your rare healing journey, your own self development as you called it.

“She is unable to listen without having a million thoughts in her head”- when we talk to anyone, except cases of extreme rarity, they hear other voices as we speak to them. They have their own conversations, so what we say may get their attention or not. Often it gets some attention, hits a neuropathway in their brain, and what they hear next is that neuropathway and the ones attached to it, and what we say is no longer heard.

anita