Dear Edie:

You wrote: “We’ve always gotten along beautifully, even after the fights/cold wars we’d get into. It just isn’t feeling like that anymore”.

It probably doesn’t feel like that (getting along beautifully) because of the fights, the cold wars. War does it, weaken the ones fighting. No beauty left, only destruction.

This is what the fights, the war, the aggression did in your friendship: it made your friendship “rocky” and in need “to patch things up” (patching up the wounds inflicted). Indeed it “taken a toll on our relationship”. It has caused Jess to “shut down and give me the silent treatment”, and to not “respond to my texts/calls… Updates her status with passive aggressive/indirect quotes… deletes me from social.. go a few months without speaking at all… ignores me… etc,”

All this is part of a war the two of you have fought against each other, and war has weakened and destroyed your friendship. It is not surprise to me. Is it to you?

anita