Dear Jezz:

I mentioned statistics in my last post to you, suggesting there is a very small chance that he will change. My estimation of the very small chance, and yours (“I know.. eventually the real him would return”) are based on his past behavior, your past experience with him.

It is similar to gambling. If you know that there is a very, very tiny chance that you will win a million dollars, will you try to win it, will you gamble?

I will answer my own question: if the gamble is investing a dollar in the game, I will definitely gamble. Every day I will put a dollar in the one million dollar machine. Maybe some days I will put more.

But if it took 10,000 dollars to put in the machine, and the chance for the million dollars is 0.0000001%, I will not. Because without the 10,000 I will not have.. let’s say rent to pay for the following month and I will be homeless.

So, look at what you are investing, how much money you put in that gambling machine. Literally how much money as well how much emotion and what kind of heartache is likely to follow.

See the bigger picture. It is difficult now, for you to move on from him. The more you expose yourself to him, the weaker and weaker you are likely to become, drained and exhausted, and the more difficult it will be to move on.

anita