Dear Earth Angel:

You are welcome. Good to read from you, every time you post.

“How do I take time for myself without having the inner critic think I’m being unproductive?”

Unfortunately, there is nothing you can do to change what your inner critic is telling you, not any more than trying to change what your parents tell you (after all your inner critic is the mental representative of your parents). The key is to notice what your inner critic is saying but to not get into a conversation with it, to not try to convince it to think any differently.

As you hear the inner critic’s position, repeat to yourself the truth. It says to you that you are productive, say to yourself: I am productive. This is what I did today … productive.

It is difficult to do this. Unfortunately, there is no easy way.

Again, you don’t argue with the inner critic. You counter its voice with the truth, but following that you don’t engage in a conversation. You disengage from the critic best you can.

Do it again and again, do your best to be calm as you practice this.

“What are good ways to teach myself new life skills?” – little by little. Here and there. Don’t pressure yourself.

The most important life skill you can practice at the moment is to manage the inner critic as I suggested. You wrote that the inner critic emotionally drains you. The better your skill at disengaging from the inner critic, the more energy you will have for the practical tasks of your day to day life.

anita