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Dear A:
He believed he wasn’t good enough (or big enough) before he met you and he still believes the same thing. No matter how many times you told him that he is good enough, that didn’t make a dent in his belief. Years later and it is as if you had no impact on him, as a matter of fact, there has been no change in what he believes to be true.
What I would take with me from this experience, if I was you, is in the next relationship you have, find out what the man believes before getting into an intimate relationship with him. If what he believes is something that makes him miserable and will make you miserable, count on that belief to persist and don’t get involved with him further.
anita