Dear Nichole:

You wrote: “It is so hard to control my impulsivity sometimes…In the 3 years living with him I was verbally abusive when we argued which was often… I continue bashing him”

And then you wrote: “I want to go back and fix our life like I know we can”.

It is a bad idea for him and for you that you go back to Florida. I don’t agree with you that “we can”. You for one can’t because you are still impulsive, you don’t have the self control required to fix things. If you flew to Florida and lived with him again, you will get angry again, and when you do, you will be verbally abusive to him again, and bash him again.

Do the right thing for him and protect him from your impulsivity. And then, do the right thing for yourself and learn self control, be it in psychotherapy if such is available to you, in an anger management class, perhaps.  Coda is not as good as these two options, but it is a place to express yourself and be heard.

anita