Hi jace,

I understand what you’re saying. When I used the word “chemistry” I wasn’t referring to only sexual chemistry; I meant the whole package — something within this relationship is missing for him at this point in his life. His words were that he’s just not “feeling it”. You know what you want; you want him, and he knows that. He sees how committed you are and he’s just not there, unfortunately. So he’s doing what he thinks he needs to do. This isn’t so unusual for guys his age.

You ask: How can I trust myself to love anyone like that again if I know that people can just change their minds for no reason? Let me just say that a lot of guys at this age simply aren’t ready to commit to one woman long term. He may be one of these guys. There’s a good chance it may just be the timing for him. He’s just not there.

There are no guarantees in relationships, it’s true. So we collect as much information as we can and make decisions based on what we know. He gave you signs. There were times you felt taken for granted and that the love you gave him wasn’t reciprocated. Trust your instincts. You read to me like a level-headed person. When something doesn’t feel right, trust yourself to recognize it.

I know it’s difficult and I know you would like a different outcome. Feel free to keep posting and I’ll try my best to help you through this.

B