Hi Anita,

Yes, these were my thoughts throughout our relationship. I always tried to shrug them off, thought it was just my insecurities from my past relationships, so I dug deep and try to work on myself more. Weekly therapy, books, journaling, meditating, the works.

He often spoke about his previous marriage and other failed relationships. I assumed, at our ages it was just part of it, we all had past relationship issues- some harder to heal from than others. The thing that stuck out was how he insisted that he picked/was attracted to dysfunctional women (which made me fearful of showing any sort of dysfunction). He never spoke of his accountability in these failed relationships. Which was a red flag that I chose to suppress due to his many, many other redeeming qualities and his very healthy outlook on the rest of life’s challenges.

My last words to him were “it’s not your fault, you just don’t know how to be in something with someone.” Sigh! I guess I always knew.

Jean