He truly was going through an identity crises, he has so much fear and anxiety because of our relationship being so serious and our personal growth going nowhere, we both started clashing and becoming resentful and suddenly things were complicated and we weren’t doing very well as a couple nor as individual and he panicked because he couldn’t see himself stuck like this being incompetent and us arguing. He then just wanted to detach himself from everything. he felt like a failure because he was failing not only within himself and career but also failing me and our life together, he couldn’t handle the pressure and all that came was his fight or flight. I was so sure he was going to end things, he became someone i didnt know. I couldn’t believe someone who was suppose to love me could do what he did but some how he overcame his anxiety and slowly started moving closer to me, i told him many times he needs to distance himself from me if he no longer wants me in his life, i told him to stop texting me and stop trying to be nice to me and he couldn’t handle me ignoring him and he just started drawing even closure. I at that point felt like he no longer wanted the break and initiated that we end the break and be a couple again but he still hadnt gotten over his anxiety of commitment, providing for me and taking responsibility for our life together was something he had great fear for but somehow during that break he overcame his lazy habits, stepped out of his comfort zone, looked for ways to help his financial status and found his masculinity again. I truly think he behaved like a coward who does not deserve me for running away and abandoning me because he feared the responsibility but he day by day worked through it, i did help him alot and try to open his eyes to his actions and how hes behaving unreasonable. Well for the last 2 months things have gotten better and we are in a much better place that we were before even before the break, he respects me, he protects and cares for me, we have open communication and he has managed to get his sex drive back which has put him in a much better mood. Yes i do have some pain and anger for what he did but i have forgiven him so that i can heal, I am alot more cautious with my heart and we are still yet to talk about the break and really bury that horrible time in our relationship and that needs to happen in its right time. i am alot happier and so is he.

It may seem that all my focus is on this relationship and him but i came to this forum for specific help with understanding the troubles in my relationship so i have only shared my in depth thoughts based on this particular matter. As well to get alot off my chest as this was an extremely difficult time in my life.

To ensure this type of thing never happens again, i will need to have a conversation with him getting to the bottom of why he did it. By understanding his reasons and showing my support for how he felt i can get him to hear how he significantly hurt me. and from there i hope to get a promise that its not okay to do that and that he will do his very best not to have it happen again.