Dear Ayumi: soon I will be away from the computer for the next 15 hours or so. When I am back I will re-visit your thread and if you answer, I will be glad to reply to you then.

* Dear Chloe:

A coincidence indeed.

“1. I kept suggesting a break multiple times.. in order to make him compromise”- that is dishonest manipulation, that is, you didn’t suggest a break because you wanted a break, but because you wanted to pressure him to do what you wanted him to do.

“2. I said lots of harsh words and insulted him a lot”- you verbally abused him, that was wrong of you.

I understand that he didn’t show up on time to meet you and didn’t explain why. He may have been disrespectful to you in other ways, maybe before you verbally abused him. Thing is, dishonest manipulation and verbal abuse are wrong no matter how disrespectful he may have been.

You had or have the healthy and fair option available to you: ask him what is his problem with showing up on time, listen to his answer, tell him that it is important to you that he shows up on time, that it distresses you when he doesn’t. Ask him to correct this behavior.

Then wait, if he continues to not show up on time (without having an emergency that will excuse it), then you can bring it up one more time, if you choose to give him one more opportunity. If he disrespects you this way one more time, then really break up with him.

*If Ayumi does return to her thread, maybe you can start your own thread, if you want to communicate further.

anita