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Reply To: I'm the toxic one in the relationship; I want to change but it's so hard for me.

HomeForumsRelationshipsI'm the toxic one in the relationship; I want to change but it's so hard for me.Reply To: I'm the toxic one in the relationship; I want to change but it's so hard for me.

#224411
Ayumi
Participant

Dear anita,

Thank you so much for your insight. I believe this is really, in fact, a wake-up call to myself. I do not want this relationship to end and neither does he. We both do know we are each others’ soulmates and will never find anyone else. In the past 6 months, he has brought me so much joy just as I have brought for him; to which I simply forget when I am angry.

I love him so much, so I am going to make the effort to change. No more arguments, but simply mature discussions.

Monthsaries seem really dumb in hindsight in the long run. I am not sure why I placed a lot of emphasis on it. Maybe because of the subconscious pressure from my friends who do celebrate it often.

Thank you once again for your insight 🙂

Another thing, however, I feel that contributes to all of these personal focuses on the little things instead of the big picture stems from my somewhat short-sightedness without considering the future. I realise this hasn’t only impacted my relationship, but my studies too. Do you have any advice on how to correct this impulsivity or short-sightedness of mine?

Additionally, I feel like I derive happiness from doing things and then getting recognition for others. How can I learn to love myself? I have struggled with this for years. I don’t know how to handle this.

I hope to hear from you again. 🙂