Dear Annie,

Every person has their own unique way of dealing with difficult situations. I understand that what applies to me may not apply to you, even then I thought I will share how my thinking goes.

I feel guilty many times over, there are many things that I regret and feel I shouldn’t have done those. I wish that I could go back in time and be able to correct those mistakes. That is like courting the impossible. It is never going to happen.

Where does that leave me? What can I do?

I can accept that I have made mistakes, accept that going forward I am still likely to make mistakes however careful I am, however cautiously I take my steps.

I see two choices in moving forwards. I can berate myself up over past mistakes or I can support myself. I think the latter is the better option. Here I take care of myself by awareness, by being mindful of how I am – to others and to myself. It is not a fast track process. It is slow and tedious. But by keeping those things that I have over my control – my thought process and my behaviours, I know I will progress. Mistakes that are likely to happen will be seen as lessons that will help me and not as proofs of my worthlessness.

Break all contact with your past when it is not serving you at all. Your fight within is between self respect over love. Create a win win by loving yourself, by respecting yourself.

Take care