Dear pain, I’ve read your post and I want to say that to express all you did, all you’ve been through and all you’re going through takes a shit tonne of courage! Seriously, most people never admit to anything like that. So many people wear masks pretending their lives are great cause they have money, cars etc, but underneath that mask they are miserable. Most people run from their pain. It takes a lot of strength to be able to face your pain like you’re doing. The very fact that you’ve reached out on this forum means there’s something inside you, even small that wants to live, that wants to get better. This site has heaps of stories from people who got all those material things you mentioned, only to discover none of it made them happy. There’s several people that have replied to your post, including me, because we relate to that deep pain, of feeling unwanted and unloved, being treated like shit and feeling left behind in life. We all come from different backgrounds and different countries, and although we may not know what it’s like growing up in a third world country, we do know about self hate and feeling like we don’t matter. The fact we’re reaching out to you shows that you do matter! That there’s people willing to share their stories and open their hearts to help you. The biggest thing for me was to start being kind to myself, be a friend to myself, show myself the love others weren’t showing me, stop believing who others told me I was due to their abusive behavior. They don’t know because they’re not me! Just like your abusers are not you! so they don’t know you. You’ve reached out for some guidance and help and people are responding to your call. People do care. We don’t know you, what you look like or anything and it doesn’t matter. You’re a fellow human being like us that deserves love and to be treated right. Hopefully you’re still with us and will read some more of these posts and know that you’re not alone in feeling that way, and people do care about you. Why not tell us your name or even a nick name, so we can stop calling you pain 🙂