Thank you so much Anita. Your words are so wise and always help me through. I do suffer from the same as you these days. I suffer with feeling joy. I feel guilty that she isn’t here anymore. I am doing better but still struggle daily. I will say I have had a bit of a distraction while I am still grieving my breakup. It is so hard to lose my mom and then not have the man who has always been there for me be there during this time. I feel so alone even though I do have family. I feel empty. I’m back home in Chicago living at home where my mother and brother resided. I sleep in my Mom’s room. I feel like my life is turned upside down. I miss florida but my family is here and I know I need them at this time. I have no clue how to restart my life. I still love my ex even though he cheated on me and is totally discarding me because I’ve bashed him so much. I feel like I’ll never find a love like ours again. I’m so lost and I try to have motivation and hope each day but I am struggling.  So many emotions at once that I feel trapped.