I am just trying to find some inner peace, by understanding why each day almost is a lesson in suffering.

The first noble truths in Buddhism is the truth of suffering. The reality is that Life is momentum – Life requiring the sacrifice of Life. Life eats Life, that is its wonder and horror. Awesome in the true meaning of the word.

You are correct then in your realization that each day is a lesson in suffering. The next question is what are you learning? What will your answer to Life be?

There are three ways that the wisdom traditions relate to The Truth that life eats life.

1. Affirmation and gratitude for life as it is, the good and the bad
2. Denial – No… Life is something that should not be. Stop the cycle and let me off
3. We can fix it… Life is a war between Good and Evil and we can fix it.

How you answer that reality for yourself will affect the way in which you relate to suffering. Will you fight life, or will you enter into the flow of Life? How much of the intensity of our suffering is created by our resistance to life?

Surely as it gets too much, a cosmic break would enable me to be of more service to others?

How are you measuring service? Everything you are and do is in service to Life (as it is) even as you suffer, create suffering and heal suffering.

There is some suffering that we create for ourselves. Usually it involves control and the poor judgment of good and bad.

Jung argued that one of the tasks of becoming required the individual to come to terms with the problem of opposites. As many of the wisdom traditions suggest when you take a close look at what appear to be opposites they disappear. The good and the not something to be separated but something that exist in each other. They are not two sides of a coin but the coin itself, the opposites, the good and the bad intimately entangled… disappear. The coin is a coin. Life is Life, as it must be and it is Yes.

Once you let go of the need to control and define life and find a way to engage in the flow you will be a service to others. It might not look like what you imagine, and you may not be recognized for it, but it will be enough… as you let all that go as well.