Dear  Paul:

When shocked, or “mentally shattered”, sticking to a routine is very important. So I hope you focus best  you can at work and  make  it through the day, then go home and do the fundamental routine tasks you do every day but rest more than usual, alone. Get  comfortable, listen to relaxing music and/ or take a long  walk in nature, and do so every day for a while, so the  dust settles in your brain, so to speak.

Regarding the  matter  that shattered  you, if you want  to  discuss  it and  you can handle it, we can, but if  we do and  it gets distressing, better to not discuss  it and  distract instead, focusing on the workday and tasks at hand.

The two of you were on a break but you still were together, I understand, I mean officially separated but  practically together?  And during that break you had sex  with  other women, she  knew  about  it but you didn’t know she  was having  sex with another man, or other  men?

anita