Hi all,

Tough evening again this evening. Just trying to manage the loss. I wish I could stop thinking about it. The urge to contact him remains.

When I actually consider doing it I get scared and my therapist explains that this is because I know what the outcome will be – and it will just reaffirm that it’s over. So I get scared of doing it.

He has advised me not to make contact, to protect my dignity. He says he will support me no matter what, but if the only purpose is to see have things changed, when clearly they haven’t, then I’m going to experience another dip.

I asked if the urge to make contact would continue and he says it goes away with time. I wish I could believe that right now. I’m mad and sad in equal measure. Has this been anyone else’s experience?