Dear Robi1992:

You are welcome and thank you for your kind words!

When  I read about your current plan to go to Spain, my immediate feeling about it was liking it, thinking it is a good idea. I have no doubt that not living with your parents is a good idea, and Spain, why not Spain, after all you had two months worth of an excellent experience there, and the weather/scenery is to your liking.

If you had a different  set  of parents, you would be a different kind of person now, why limit yourself (minimizing that screen) because of who your parents are. If you want your screen/life minimized, choose it because this is who you want to  be, not because of who they are. In other words, I hope your life  becomes about you, who you were early on, before you adjusted to your home life.

Here is where your hope is, as I see it: you wrote about your father, “My father never  makes eye contact with me (or others.. haven’t really noticed that)”- it is  that not making eye contact, isolating, that makes it possible for him to remain minimal. You want to maximize the screen, to shift to full or fuller screen, so to speak, then do make eye contact with people.

This is how we, being the social animals that we are (like dogs and wolves and such) get the energy and motivation to explore, that very connection with others. But one has to be  selective as to  who these others are.

But there must be at least one other person with whom you do have a meaningful connection, looking into the eyes, not hiding, but revealing.

It  will not be easy, far from it, but you can do it and I hope you post again anytime you’d like. It is not about me, that is, your journey is not about pleasing or displeasing me, so post regardless of what is happening and I will be glad to reply to you every time you do.

anita