Dear IpkR09:

I took some time  to re-read your  posts on your previous thread. There are a few topics worthy of addressing regarding that thread and this, being  the same topic. I will address only one for now, and that is the issue  of  your sister.

Regarding your ex boyfriend, you wrote in your previous thread: “My sister  met him and she said he  loved me very much and he is  very serious regarding you”. On this thread you wrote about your sister: “She never approved of any of my past relationships. None of them”- so I suppose she approved of your ex boyfriend and then she changed  her mind and disapproved, correct?

On your current thread you wrote regarding the  current man in your  life that he asked her permission regarding dating you, she told  him it  is okay with her, that he should call you  to ask you out and then told you to refuse him (“my sister agreed when she talked to him and  asked  him to call me directly and  ask me out this evening… Once she got off the call with  him,  she asked to deny his date request  when  he calls. She did  not want me to go  out with him”).

So, she didn’t want you to go  out with him and went about it dishonestly, not wanting him to know that it  is she who was refusing the date. She wants to  control you but she doesn’t want him, her friend, to know she is the one  making your decision. I  suppose she feels it is wrong of her to decide for you,  so she keeps it a secret from him.

You wrote: “before all this.. she appreciated this  guy a lot… Now suddenly she changed her entire  opinion about  him and told me how bad he was..My sister.. told  my parents… Seeing that they weren’t convinced.. She poisoned their minds against me in general then against the guy”.

What motivates your sister to keep you away from relationships, dishonestly and energetically working hard to keep you from having a relationship with any man, willing to turn her/ your parents against  you for that aim?

And why is it so important for  you  to please your sister, why do you give her power over  your life?

anita