Hi Ella,

My husband is sixteen years older than me. Yes, he will probably die first but why live with thirty years of regret? Also, I could die first, who knows?

I’d be more worried about him being a father at fifty. And you’re not crazy high risk, but your concerns are real.

What is probably bugging you the most is the Time Limit of it all. Two years isn’t that long.

What bothers me the most for you is the baggage he brings.

What I would do is keep him as a lover. Then when the kids are totally grown and flown, you could always come back to the US and marry the guy. But kids would be off the table, unless you really want them. NOW.

Best,

Inky