Dear Agnes1205:

You are welcome.

You wrote to me: “but I forgot to tell you that she hated it when I ever tell her she’s a liar. idk.. she said it’s hurting her  when she heard me say something like that”-

-when a person lies (intentionally and  knowingly saying something that is not true), and you tell the person: you lie! It is not likely that the person will like it and feel good hearing that you know. Her reaction does not indicate that she didn’t  lie. It indicates that  she doesn’t want you to know  that  she  lies.

You wrote: “I guess you’re right.. we don’t know the truth anymore”- from your shares I know that  she  lies and you do too. This is not questionable. What I wrote to you before is that let’s say in half  an hour of her talking  to you, I don’t  know if  she lies five minutes, ten minutes or twenty five minutes.

You wrote that  you forgot to tell me that  “she’s trying her  best to be  a better  person and  try her  best to stay alive because of  me”-

-If she tried  her best, when you pointed to her that  she lies, she would have responded differently, still hating it, but admitting  that  she did  lie. And then, she repeatedly ignored  you, that means she didn’t need you to “stay alive” when she ignored  you. One more thing, if she needed you to  stay alive, she shouldn’t be hurting the  person she  needs to stay alive.

She  told  you in the past: “oh, it’s okay.. if you want  to leave just leave. I  can’t force you to stay.  I  don’t want to  be  manipulative”-

-you shared  that  she told  you something about another guy in her  life, a guy who is interested in her or she is interested  in him, and you responded with: “I hope you are happy with that  guy”. Next, she told you: “I told you about it  just to hurt you so  you’ll hate me…for me it’ll always only you, even to think dating with someone else  makes  me feel like I want to puke… I told you about it just to  hurt you so you’ll hate me”-

If it was  true that she wants to puke at the thought  of another guy in her  life and  what  she told you earlier about another guy was a lie, then “I told you about it just  to hurt you so  you’ll hate  me” means she  is okay with telling you a lie so to cause you to behave a certain way–  this  is dishonestly manipulative.

When she  told you that it is okay  for you  to leave her etc., that is  probably  also dishonestly manipulative. She may want  you to try to leave her so that she will make you feel guilty about it and hurt you… more. Some people do enjoy making other people suffer.

Consider the possibility that  this woman tells you things (ex.: that there is another guy, that she is gay) and ignores you repeatedly for the purpose of seeing you suffer. It makes her feel … loved when she sees you suffer because of her.

Regarding your recent request for advice: I think that if you tell her that you are ending all contact with you, she will try her best to make  you change your mind: telling you she can’t live without  you, telling you that she will do her best to be a  better  person, ignoring  you and seeing maybe that will make  you chase her, and  so  on.

This is why my advice is for you to block her in each and every way possible so that she cannot  contact you. Tell that friend she talks  to, to not tell you if she calls him/her (this is what  happened before, leading you to contact her. If the friend, or friends will not respect your request, end contact with them as well.

And post again, anytime. I will reply to you further if  you share what will be taking  place next.

anita