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Hi Mark,
Yes, I realize what he did to me, for many weeks I felt so angry with myself for letting that to happen, but finally I kind of forget myself and I stopped thinking about that. I know I have to get tested, but I think I have been delaying that because I do not want to bring the shame and angry again, but definitely it is something I will do.
And yes again, having any kind of relationship is a challenge for me. The point is, most of my friends are already married, with families and their own lifes, and everytime I just feel more isolated, even when I try to keep me busy when I have free time to think about that. I am not looking my self for a sexual lover, but it seems like that is the only important thing for men.
I was raised in a conservative latino culture and raised Catholic. During my childhood there was a point in which I had friends, but then I got isolated and became more like an introvert, I do not really remember exactly how that hapened.