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Reply To: What if you are the toxic person?

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#272607
Lily
Participant

Dear anita,

yes I am feeling much better today. Now after the sports class with my friend I feel quite happy and satisfied. To be honest, I am relieved that this thing with K. is over. It caused me lots of stress and anxiety and I was overwhelmed.

I think I’m not too irrational much of the time. Mainly when stressed and I try to please people too much, that’s when problems start. With people I’m more comfortable with, it’s easier for me to say no and tell my true opinion. Your advice to make decisions when calmer is valid. I want to try to take a moment to think before saying yes from now on. And also think more about what I want.

So far I didn’t think I hurt my therapist. But I have to admit that I worried that I am a too complicated patient. In the last sessions it was a little tense. Because the same thing as always happened, I didn’t trust myself and let her dominate the session. And she didn’t feel that I was feeling uncomfortable, so she got worried. I will see how it goes on Friday.

Good to hear that your leg is doing better. It is not easy to overcome that inner critic, so be kind to yourself. Maybe at first you partly thought you were guilty, but then you realized that it isn’t true. That is the most important thing. And the pain must have been intense. I always get angry, when feeling pain. It is o.K. to not always think or act perfectly, don’t you think? But it’s easy to say! I often get so afraid of making mistakes and get too perfectionist. But that is something I want to let go of, hopefully, at some point.

Please continue to get better. And thank you. It helped me talking to you yesterday when I was feeling so distressed!