Dear MG:

If I was you, I will type him a letter, one page. There I will state to him that I do  not believe it is right to have a romantic relationship with a married man and therefore I am ending the romantic relationship  and will be having a proper work colleague relationship with him from now  on, same as you  have with other work colleagues, men and women.

I will not suggest to him that I am ending the relationship; instead, I will state it confidently and assertively. I will end the letter with wishing him well in life.

Also, in the letter I will not tell him that he should be happy with his wife or how you think his marriage life should be. I wouldn’t mention anything about his wife and future family.

If you can give him the letter when the two of you happen to be alone (in the work place, or maybe in a restaurant outside the work place), give him the letter and ask that he reads it right there and then. If he argues with you, tell him that it is not negotiable. If you see him in pain, you can say: I am sorry for your pain and I wish you well.

After that, treat him like you do any other work colleague and see him, of course, only in the workplace.

anita