Dear ElliR:

I will summarize what you shared here:

About a year ago you quit your job and moved back home, a relationship you had with a man also ended at the time and you were confused and depressed. For the last year you lived at home with your parents, including your “toxic narcissist” mother, in a room and bathroom attached to the family home, kitchen shared. During this year you started a part time job, saw a psychologist, did “swimming, drawing, sewing”. You also contacted your ex boyfriend, apologized for your behavior and suggested to resume the relationship. He strongly rejected your offer and you had panic attacks, guilty feelings for the pain you believed you caused him and you felt ashamed.

Four months after his rejection he contacted you, told you that he loved you, you suggested meeting so to talk and he never contacted you again. Recently you started a new job but you suffer from anxiety/panic attacks and depression, you don’t want to move away from your family’s home and you want to  quit your job.

My suggestions: stay living where you are, start seeing a psychologist again, the same one from before or a new one, one that is capable and will be able to help you. Continue your job,  one day at a time. Focus on these two goals: psychotherapy and your job.

And please do post anytime. I would like to learn more about you and your life.

anita