Thank u Anita for your reply. I will do what u suggested. I am full of fears, I fear to meet a new guy, to have family, kids etc. I fear as well death. I dont know what is happening to me right now. The people around me, they see me like “wow you found a job” “now its remain to find a guy” and its make me feel weird hence I am not feel confident and I cannot even imagine a guy with me, I afraid to trust anymore. And once a guy start to talk me I directly see him as friend, not someone who can be my bf or even husband. I dont know what is happening to me, really.