Ramsey,

I sense that you are an angry and sad young man.

I’m not sure why you are here except to vent, which is OK.  It does not seem that you are looking for advice or answers.

I thought I’d throw this out for you to either consider or disregard. The Peace Corps.  It gives people an opportunity to do something good for others (i.e. get out of our own misery and circumstances) and to experience different cultures and geographies.  Or if you stay in the U.S. there is Americorps.

I wish you well on your journey.

Mark