Hi Kkasxo, thank you for your thoughtful reply. Could you bear with me & possibly reply to my next answer?

So I have thought this myself & he even admitted that he thought getting very close to me had become too much. He actually said he felt his feelings for me ‘changed’ after opening up about the abuse. What could I do? It hurt terribly to hear that.

But now here we are: he’s often in contact, wants to meet every week & clearly cares about me a lot. A key aspect I forgot to mention is that he is moving abroad for a period in a month. This was another aspect of breaking up, as he wasn’t sure about doing LDR & I didn’t want to date an ambivalent man.

Now that we’re friends, he has asked if I’ll visit him & has asked if he can visit me. So what do I do? On the one hand, he is not ready to be in a relationship because he feels he needs to work through his issues first. Secondly, he was the one that wanted to be ‘friends’. So, do I have a conversation with him before he goes? If we remain friends, my feelings will probably cool and change in time. But I worry that suppressing the romantic part I still feel will mean being inauthentic to myself. At the same time losing him completely is almost too much to bear.

• This reply was modified 5 years, 10 months ago by Kat.