Lukey,

It is easy to judge someone who deals with life by complaining and withdrawing from life by drinking.  I can imagine myself not being able to tolerate someone who won’t help themselves.

Have you and/or your gf thought of doing something different like take her out of the house for a walk, a movie, a live music event or with other people?  Even AA where there is a community of people who will listen to her and her pain?

I invite you to be compassionate to someone who is in pain.  We frequently judge others based on our own experience of our life and how we behave.  The key to compassion is empathy.  It is to walk in someone else’s shoes.

How should you tell your gf you don’t want to be around her mother?  How about telling her that you want to love and support her but you have a hard time and not have the patience to be around her mother.

Mark