Dear Hannah:

We are all scared of people who are angry at us. Some are more afraid than others. We fear other people’s anger because anger does motivate all animals to attack. For  example, if you trespass and there is a dog there on the property, the dog will get angry, bark and growl, and you know that you are in danger of being chased and bitten.

A child gets very scared of a parent/ adult being angry at the child, because the child is small and weak and so very dependent, unable to protect herself once attacked.

Now, an adult is bigger and stronger than a child, more capable to protect herself. An adult also knows that in a public place, people are not likely to attack, when angry, because other people will witness the attack and will call the police, giving their witness testimony accounts. Otherwise, in private, people are less likely to attack knowing the consequences. People want to avoid negative consequences for themselves. An adult also knows that other people have their own lives, own worries, own fears and they are not 24/7 occupied with: how can I harm this or that person. They are busy protecting themselves from harm because they are afraid themselves.

Think as an adult, best you can, what is the reality of this or that situation, how likely is this person to attack or harm me. While there is always some chance, often the chance is very, very low.

anita