Thanks so much for your insight everyone! Much appreciated.

Mark:  You’re so right, and reading this, I feel like it reflects me in relationships almost exactly.  Very interesting, and worth looking into.

Anita:  I have seemed to always struggle with intimacy, I seem to get into my head a bit (or a lot), when it comes to sex, which I’m sure my partner can sense.  The STD issue also weighs heavy on me sometimes, and has brought me quite a bit of shame.  Fortunately, my guy now actually has it as well, so we share that bond.

I am still shy, but I’m getting better with it.  But yes, the sex issues could be something to look into as well.

Valora:  You could very well be right! I have thought of that before.  As much as I want a relationship, I think I’m scared, so maybe I am attracting unavailable men for that reason.    Lately, I have been thinking a lot about my dad, and my failed relationship with him.  I think him leaving has had more of an effect on me than I thought.

I did spend time with my guy last night.  It was very emotional and we talked at length how we are feeling.  He is still struggling with his feelings for me.  He thinks he should be feeling more for me at this point (after two months).  I tried to tell him sometimes the best relationships grow over time slowly.  The relationships that I have had where it started out really strong never lasted.  He keeps saying I’m everything he wants, and when he thinks about the future with me, it looks very positive.  Hes just not sure he can get there with me.  He did say he’s willing to give us more time to see, but he is scared of hurting me.  I’m scared too, but think its worth seeing what can happen with us.

He also mentioned it could be him, as he has felt disconnected from everyone for the last few years since his engagement ended.    I text him last night and said I hope I didnt talk him into something he doesn’t want, and he said ‘no you didnt.  I have been thinking about it a lot.  I want it to work’.

Part of me wants to just end it, because I dont want to be with someone who doesnt feel the same way, but what if he can get there? It could be great….I’m torn.