Dear lisa:

I would tell a man in the first date or the second, as you talk, that you are fearful of feeling trapped in a relationship and ask him if he fears that too, or what he fears in the context of a relationship.

It is not about telling him you are fearful so that he has that information, it is about sharing and exchanging information. Fear is not unique to you, every man you meet is also afraid.

Once two people honestly share about their fear, the two can help each other, as a team, repeatedly talking, checking with each other, coming up with ideas and solutions along the way.

anita