Dear coconut:

I am looking at the last three lines of your recent post: “I always try to be very nice, agree with them, not contribute to the conversation to not say something ‘wrong’ or what they don’t agree with”.

You asked me: “Can you suggest me some ways I can overcome, step by step, my social awkwardness and my fear of  people (fear to be myself, to  say my thoughts/opinion)?”

My answer: yes, I can suggest a first step, and if you follow it and get back to me about it, I will respond, and at some point suggest a second step and then a third.

Step 1 then: remember a recent social situation where a conversation took place and you felt afraid to say something ‘wrong’, that is,  something that the other, or others will disapprove of and as a result will be mean to you. Report the conversation to me best you can, paraphrased, in the form of he said/ she said. At one point in the conversation insert what you would have said if you weren’t afraid to say it.

*If you can’t remember such a conversation, next time you are in a group setting where you feel  uncomfortable, think about my step 1 suggestion and pay attention to the conversation so that you can do this exercise.

anita