Hi both, sorry for the silence, long trek back from Vietnam to England, home safely now. It’s cold…but at least it’s sunny.

Kkasxo – I don’t think anything can ever really prepare you for the shocking reality of death, it’s inescapability, the finality. Well done on still being strong enough to provide such help and support in their time of need, it made a difference and that is invaluable.  I think death is such a kick to us all to make the most of life, living truly and honestly as anything else is a waste.  No, you aren’t over-reacting about your ex’s(?) reaction in my mind anyway – actions speak loudest and he clearly prioritised his fun over supporting you with your pain. Not exactly ideal for the support you’d want from a long-term, loving relationship, can understand entirely why that reality would hurt, especially at a low point you just don’t need that.  As ever, here if you need me, if I can help.

Shelby, how goes it now? It’s good he’s texting you etc at least, that has to be better communication than before?  I didn’t really understand what you meant by this bit though ” I guess I just feel sad that no-one has any hope whatsoever for myself and my ex and I guess that hurts because it makes me feel like I’m less than I am.”??  One, it doesn’t matter what anybody else thinks, sure we all don’t want to see you get hurt again since we can see no reason/evidence that either of you has changed to think that it will end differently this time around – but we aren’t you, it’s only you and him who need to have hope. There is no reason you would be any less of a person if it breaks up again than before??  It’s not like because he rejects you, you become worth less in any else’s view?? What am I misunderstanding here?