Dear Cali Chica:

“I don’t see myself as fragile at all- but instead, hard, harsh, angry, stern, severe”-

The child in you, the child locked within you, she is soft and reaching out for love. She is hurt.

The hard, severe person you have become is a role you took on, without planning to, it so happened. You lived three decades or so in this role, the soft child locked inside the harsh personality.

Having her locked, keeping her locked does not allow a calm living, a peace of mind. The gap between the child and your personality/ role keeps that anxious baseline going and going.

To free that child, we can come up with a poem about that, but in real  life, it is a long process that takes courage. It is about experiencing yourself in a third dimension unfamiliar to you. Freeing that child is not an intellectual event, cannot be. It will involve you feeling again the hurt you don’t want to ever feel again!

When we talk, in the exercise I hope to resume with you, let that child come up, bit by bit. Let her out of her locked room, gently invite her to play, to talk, to express. After doing that for a long time, she, the child/ you.. she will feel that excitement, a joy, that will give you the courage to experience that hurt of past. It will make it worth it to … become soft again. It will make it possible.

anita