Good evening all,

Ever so sorry about the recent silence! It has been ever so hectic in Kammy world but I promise to catch up on all your posts and reply properly!

So the low down on Kammy world! Here comes! I continued keeping busy looking for my place as that was top priority, viewings upon viewings and it got so tiring in the end. Things with Mr A we’re so up and down, as per usual, I got to a point where I just withdrew myself from the situation and focused on me and bam! He found a flat and put down a deposit… for us. Well what a bold statement Mr A! To my surprise, I actually fell in love with the place which was strange as every other place I had viewed was always ‘lovely’ or ‘nice’ But not home. This place I can picture being home, it feels like home.

So ladies, as wary as I am, big test is coming my way and fast approaching with our move in date of the 3rd of June.

The situation itself is full of humour if you ask me. I continuously tell him that WHEN (not if) we split up, he needs to do blah blah blah. I also have the everyday moment of doubt like ‘what the hell are you doing Kam?!’ But on the other hand I have little inklings of excitement (mainly because I LOVE the flat, don’t know how I feel about my room mate to be though hehe).

Having discussed this with a few friends I’ve come to the conclusion that the worst has already passed. This is a test and the last one at that as I KNOW this is absolutely the last straw for us. We NEED to be away from his family to even remotely give things a go and that will not happen unless we move. And the back and forth of the situation of the last few months is absolutely not on anymore. I’m so tired of it, it just cannot continue. So we either give things a go and properly, or we do not. Either way, I’m of the view that this will make things absolutely crystal clear for the both of us. It will either work or it will not work. The decision to be together or not will show itself in the process.

Epiphany moment approaching. I’ll either be pleasantly surprised or I’ll never doubt my gut feeling again. Lessons.

I am nervous, anxious, but at the same time SO relieved that the end to this horrid chapter of my life is coming.

Plus if/when we do split, hopefully I would’ve already adjusted to the idea of living on my own so it won’t be like going cold turkey moving alone & away from family. So I guess that’s a perk too right?

Do I think I’m stupid? Possibly. Do I think this will work? Erm, I’m apprehensive. Do I think this is the right thing to do? Oh who knows girls! I’m absolutely winging this one!

On another note, my therapy course is coming to an end an I am finding myself pondering about how far I’ve actually come… and if I’ve made any progress at all?! Hmm..

Shelby, how have you been?! What is new with you? Is the ex back from his holiday now? How is your make up course? How is work? Have you booked that holiday to OZ yet?! I can’t wait to hear from you!

Michelle, I am so jealous that you’ve got yet another holiday booked! Such a free spirit, I wish I could travel that much! How does it feel being back in the U.K.? The weather’s been so horrible since last weekend, so up and down, gave us a little taster of summer with the 25 degrees over the Easter weekend and then started pelting with rain for the remainder of the week!

P.S I’ve missed you girls! I can’t go this long without communicating with you guys anymore!