Morning Shelby,

Thank you for your kind words as always. It is true, I have come a long way and into the light but on days like this PTSD is really kicking the sh** out of me! Since last night my mind has been nothing but a trigger zone, I woke up at 6am this morning crying my absolute eyes out (this hasn’t happened in a while). I am on edge, my mind keeps wandering to the events of last summer and no matter how much I try to stay focused on the present it just keeps re-routing and doing it’s own thing. Very frustrating as you then think ‘Hey brain! Why are you doing this to me?!’ I feel it’s going to be a long, sad day full of fear and tears. Full of torment and horrible horrible memories that I would rather forget but hey.. all part of healing right?

It’s crazy to hear that your subconscious is almost reassuring you that your plans for travel are going ahead. On the other hand, it’s a good thing. People all say that we have a subconscious and gut feelings to listen to them, humans many many years ago used these things for survival so we have to let it do its thing. I’m guessing as you have been pondering over the idea of travel on a serious level the last few days your family aren’t yet aware? What do you think they’d think of it all? Also, would it just be Australia that you want to go and explore or are you planning to do a trip somewhere else as well?

Just on a side note though, you’ve absolutely complimented my progress in acknowledging my feelings & triggers but Shelbs, you’re doing just the same! You realise that you may be sad, hurting, disappointed, a little lost, you’ve admitted those things, but yet you are trying your best everyday and coming up with solutions to better yourself. Proud moment!!!!