Dear Tania:

Almost 7 years ago you met a guy, “had a very passionate 3 weeks”. After that you met another man and married him 4 years ago. During your marriage, at night, (perhaps your husband was sleeping and you went to another room) you took photos of your naked body, and sent him those photos. He in turn sent you naked photos of his body.

Your complaint: “for 7 pathetic years we’ve been texting back and forth and he hasn’t made any effort to see me”-

-those “7 pathetic years” include your 4 year marriage to “an amazing man… Kind, genuine.. he loves me”- an amazing, kind, and genuine man who loves you makes for four pathetic years?

If the man you married really does love you, if he is kind and genuine, either set him free or make yourself worthy of him.

“he hasn’t made any effort to see me”- you wanted him to make an effort to see you, and if he did make such effort..?

“I don’t want him out of my life completely, I think one option would be to transition to a friendship”- but there is no basis to a friendship, all the communication you had with him in the last 4 years was a very casual talk in the hospital and “what’s up”  on texts plus naked selfies. If you want a friend, why not aim at a friend who has more to say than “what’s up?”

Honestly, you desire a man who is not your husband. For as long as you communicate with him, it is desire that motivates you, not friendship.

“I am weak”- what about honest?

anita