Thank you everyone-

I didn’t contact him this weekend. I was working so I was busy most of the time. I haven’t had urges to text, more like check his ‘stories’ on snapchat because I used to do that all the time (anyone on snapchat would know that those stories are just an ‘attention seeking–attention giving’ tool,  ha!) but Im no longer on the app. Good thing. I haven’t had facebook or instagram or any other social media in several years so that helps.

Chloe Rose– thank you for sharing your experience. I can see why self hatred would make this worse or prolong this situation. I did some thinking and I also feel like the way Im treated at work can trigger some of my behavior. Im often yelled out and other things and when I go home I just want to go to a happy place. Im making my home, husband and doggy my happy place now. I’ll be finishing in this place in one year and hope to find a nice happy workplace as well.

Will keep you updated and thanks again,

Tania