robert,

You don’t think that your wife’s violent behavior is not sensed or known by your children?  They don’t have to be on the direct receiving end in order to be traumatized.

You use your finances as an excuse to keep your wife and her lover in the same home as your family.  You assume that it is you and your children have to move out.  Why can’t you kick your wife out?  I find it interesting you did not entertain that option, again that seems like victim mentality.

I know it is easy for me to say but you are reaching out to this community for advice, observations, suggestions, and sharing of our own experiences in order to best counsel you.

Mark