Hi Tnaer123,

Because of what has happened trust is no longer a part of your relationship.  This is not about you being second best, this is about your wife’s betrayal.  You could go to marriage counselling with your wife so that you can explore the way forward and decide whether or not you have a future with your wife or you could end your marriage now.  If you want to stay together then you have to let this affair go and find ways of addressing the issues which were in your marriage before the affair began.  This requires honest communication and a willingness to accept that being married to the ‘forces’ creates fear, loneliness, loss of support etc.

Feeling ‘second best’ is your ego talking.  Is that helpful to the survival of your marriage?  The other guy is out of her life, you are not.  Reclaim your power!

Peggy