Dear Natalija:

“It seems he didn’t completely get over that when he is talking about it. Like he is still hurt’- I don’t see this at all as a deal breaker. We do carry hurts from our pasts, but it doesn’t mean we can’t form honest and loving relationships in the future.

“they decided to stay and live together because the kids are still small.. have separate rooms and live like roommates”- possibly a good situation for the kids if their parents display no aggression, verbal  or otherwise, against each other and/ or against the children. If there is a significant financial advantage in this living situation, such that affords the children their basic needs, it makes sense.

“we still didn’t have sex… He said he can start something leading to sex and suddenly feels some blockage”-

–if you are okay with dating a man in that living circumstance, willing to not visit him at his home and to not meet his children until they are grown (what age, did he say?), then regarding the sex- if the two of you remain in that step of “something leading to (intercourse)”, not aiming at intercourse, he is likely to not feel pressure and therefore, no blockage. After repeated such no-expectations experiences, he may relax and finally proceed to the next step (if the two of you do desire that next step).

anita