Anita, I’ve read your last post and did like you ask last night. I first listen to some breathing techniques and then go to bed and try to remember what it was like. It wasn’t hard, it came very quick. I remember the sound of key in lock, his steps next to my door, talking, pleading, checking door nob. But I was also able to remember how I act, the tension, freezing myself to be able to hear EVERYTHING better and now what to do. My shallow breath and even like I feel my ear muscles. I must say that I was pretty calm, but it make me cry a bit. I usually tend to do that. After this I just go to sleep like normal. Also there was no other sounds at home or from neighbours at this time.

Sherin, thank you for your insight! I think that you are right, its easy for me to avoiding caring for myself etc and focusing on others. Thank you for that idea, it gives me more hope that I will controle my life, like my real life and what I want to do 🙂

Meg