Dear noname:

“I don’t know who I am or my purpose in a poetic sense, not in a scientific rational kind of way”-

– I know who you are. This answer is somewhat poetic and it is true to who I am as well, and who every human being (and every social animal is) in the beginning of life:

You are a boy who loves his mother.

This is who you are in your core, a boy who loves his mother. This will never change, this is who you were in the beginning.

And this is why when she didn’t love you back, and when she neglected you, it hurt where it hurts most: in the soft part of us. There is nothing more painful than the broken heart of a child.

I want you to come to the awareness that indeed, your child heart was broken by unrequited love- you loved your mother and she didn’t love you back. A no contact with your mother in itself will not do, it is the awareness that she broke your heart that I believe you need to access.

I hope we continue to communicate on my suggested poetic answer to you.

anita