Dear blkhwkdwn1:

If you disappear again from her life, better you disappear in a different way from before. By this point, your disappearances are business as usual. This time tell her the whole truth of what is distressing you so much that you feel the need to cut contact with her.

From what you shared in your recent post, paraphrased, the reasons are:

1. You like her too much and want much more reciprocal contact with her, you want her to want to initiate contact with you regularly and she hasn’t. And every time you want her to contact you and she doesn’t,  that makes you suffer. So you figure, no contact= no suffering.

2. You never felt that you were good enough for her, so you never considered being her boyfriend, but still your feelings for her were so strong. Also, at times you lost your feelings for her, and if you were her boyfriend, you can’t even depend on your feelings for her to stay.

3. You don’t want to get between her and her boyfriend in any way, so that she doesn’t get hurt.

Did I state your reasons correctly? Edit, add or delete if you want. Better prepare a rough draft, then a final draft, so that you can read it to her from paper when on the phone, or in person; or text the final draft to her.

anita